Moving Day.
FeatherLight is moving into office space today. It’s crispy cold outside so I know my fingers are going to burn from the cold carrying in bins and boxes even with my gloves on. I know it’s probably going to take longer than I anticipate, and unexpected things will happen. One thing that I believe is foundational is being real with people. If I am not authentic, people, especially children will know it. I choose to share in hopes people relate and learn and then grow towards meeting their life goals. I know many therapists take a very different stance on disclosures. To me, that’s cool, it’s them being their authentic selves too.
So today I’m filled with excitement. I am also a bundle of nerves and anxiety. Since obtaining the LLC back in October, I’ve spent so much time and care planning, ensuring that everything would be ready for this day. Despite years of experience and training I will never escape being fully human, having feeling mixed up feelings just like anyone else. I can be excited and afraid at the same time. It’s okay to be both/and, or either/or when it comes to emotions.
Special items that will stay at the FeatherLight Office
To be in a place to take action, people need to acknowledge what it is that holds them back. It’s not always an external factor, sometimes the block is within. Reflecting on how powerful anxiety and fear can be lets me analyze what I need to move through the discomfort, the distress and step forward. Without action my dreams remain dreams only. Do I do the things I suggest to clients? I’m human, not always, but certainly, this is a good time to apply those skills.
So what am I doing as I get ready to load those boxes and bins? I reflect on what I’ve already accomplished, figuring out how to start a practice, how to do some networking, how to help people grow and meet their goals. I look for what I’ve learned in failures, and know to go one step at a time. I look inside at my own past hurts, breathe and assure myself of what is in the present moment- the people I’ve invited into my life with love and support. I recognize areas where I need help and I ask. What is the worst case scenario if I fail?
Play Therapy, EMDR and supplies to help people find their wings
If I failed, I learned. I know what to do differently, to reassess where I am, the direction I thought I needed to go and I make a change. If I fail then I simply need new direction. In no way am I saying it would be pain free or that I wouldn’t feel sad. I know I would, but I also know I would move through it to the next thing.
Right now, everything has led me to this move, this new chapter. I’ve learned to trust my gut instinct when something feels right. Through the summer months I thought I was going to go in a very different direction, to work in a school. While I really wanted to do some work in that school, to build a wellness program, deep down I had some doubts, but I was following a desire. I knew I needed a change but the change I thought I wanted is what led me here. Through a rejection I found a new direction. The sensation is very different, I don’t have the doubt. I recognize the internal assurance within my gut.
If all that had not occurred, I wouldn’t be here right now. The journey over the last year is filled with hurts and joys, excitement and fear. So yes, I feel the anxiety of “what if…” but I choose to focus on the excitement of “here I am”.